The Frantic Dreaming
by firstForward
Summary: Ishizu expects everything to go exactly as she's envisioned with her meeting with Kaiba. Things fall apart faster than she would have believed.


The Frantic Dreaming

It was the sort of driving mindlessness that encompassed all active corners of the brain, the kind that shook out the crinkles of leftover feelings (that the seat had an uncomfortable lump in it, maybe, or that the dull thrumming in the ears was beginning to lull the body into sleep). It was the sensation of having complete and half-formed and already mulled over thoughts all rendered meaningless, and dragged under the silence of the very firm _I already know the answer_. The very confident _I already know the feeling_. The very clinical, calculating _nothing matters because everything has already happened_.

'Everything has already happened' was something she frequently thought, which meant: _everything has already been foreseen_. And there was no stopping any of it from happening.

Everything, that is, that was important to the immediate present. Her present. The present of the catastrophe of betrayal, and all of the events following it. The present of her sitting in the conference room, knowing the feel of the wood of the table without bothering to even touch it. Knowing the sensation of the lump of the chair, while already letting her mind wander from the thought. Ishizu Ishtar settled into that knowing feeling, that state of mind that saw things that she had not yet done and treated them like memories. She settled into the discomfort of the seat, the thrumming in her ears. Then she let go of all feeling, and was no more.

Gold glowed around her neck.

She opened her eyes.

The conference preparations were well underway. People crowded the room, setting up video cameras, lighting, and sorted out snack bowls and wrapped sandwiches on the tables. People with clipboards and pens made checkmarks in little perfect boxes, nodding in satisfaction. Ishizu felt her hair being pulled, and raised her eyes just so, to see a hair stylist finishing straightening her hair. She thought, why would I agree to that? But it made no difference. She already had.

Someone was talking to her, phone in hand. "You wanted to get a hold of Seto Kaiba? The news station would like to start pretty soon here, so you had better call now."

Ishizu reached out and took the phone, dialling whilst keeping her head from dipping to avoid annoying the hair stylist. There was a slight feeling of sweat around the object; Ishizu thought, his first day on the job? He's probably nervous. "Thank-you for your assistance," she said calmly, and waved her hand in dismissal. The man quickly went to go fulfill other odd requests.

Her fingers found the numbers to press, and she raised the phone to her ears, listening to the ringing. A secretary answered promptly, and Ishizu got right down to business with her request. There was agreement to relay the information, and then the line went dead.

Well, Kaiba, she thought, I do believe you will get my message on time. Now all there is left to do is to make a speech about my exhibit, and make it sound interesting enough to get you down to the museum. Though, she was assured that if nothing else, her promise of rare cards was sure to entice him. The man did have a thing for valuable cards.

Kaiba was predictable, if nothing else. Even without her Necklace, she felt that she would be able to guess at the actions that he would take, from her brief glimpses into his life through her Item and from looking at what news articles she could that circulated to her corner of the world. Kaiba had his pride, and his ambition, and these were things that she could use against him. These were what she could appeal to, in order to obtain what she desired. It was unfortunate that she had to bring so many others into this, but it could not be helped. She could no longer hope to bring down her brother alone. She could no longer hope to save him from himself, without someone else's inclusion in his path of destruction. Kaiba had resources, and fame, and most of all he could not be connected to her, and so perhaps her brother would not suspect. Perhaps.

(Her mind always grew clouded when she thought of her brother, even with her Item's assistance.)

And so time skipped by, and she sat patiently, awaiting the inevitable. Lights were switched on. People left, people stepped aside. The room began to quiet down. Ishizu was given a microphone, and her signal to speak, fingers counting down as the reflective lens of the video camera gleamed back at her. Ishizu stared into the lens as if she could see the eyes of everyone in Domino. She stared at the lens as if every person watching was a possible target. Many could and would be hurt from her actions. And yet she opened her mouth anyway, and appealed first and foremost to the businessman still seated in his office downtown, perhaps just now receiving the information she had given the secretary.

Gold glinted on her collar; Ishizu kept her voice light-hearted as she spoke about her exhibit at the museum. She could see Kaiba in the lens, breathing evenly as he listened to his secretary, eyes flicking over to the screen. She could see his brother in the lens, cheerfully commenting on her words. She could see Kaiba's eyes narrow. Considering.

Ishizu made appropriate remarks about the value of the exhibit, of its rare artefacts, and knew it held no interest for the man beyond the glass. Vaguer words were added into her speech, words suggesting grandeur and entertainment. Curiosities beyond what one could imagine. She let her chin tilt upward in pride, let her voice dip and rise in tones to convey her hidden meanings. Reflected in the lens, a man in a business suit heard nothing but prattle, but held onto the knowledge of an offering through his phone. Kaiba noted only her traditional dress, the expensive gold ornaments, and the manner of her speaking. And he noted her straight hair, obviously done by a professional. And he thought, this is a woman who I will allow to approach me.

In the lens, Kaiba made his decision to go. Outside it, Ishizu only smiled very minimally and breathed a short sigh of relief.

The first stage of her task had begun.

When the recording ended, Ishizu made such excuses as she could to leave without dallying at the snack table, and nodded to two robed men standing out in the hallway. "I am to meet Kaiba at the exhibit." Easy words, but in an ancient tongue. Habit, admittedly. She could not quite break it, and often found herself using languages unnecessary to a conversation before she had even thought about it.

"I didn't realize he agreed," said one man, as they left the building, with her flanked on both sides by her companions. They almost looked like they might have been bodyguards, which was a reasonable assumption (though Ishizu might have fought a laugh if anyone had suggested as such to her).

"He didn't. Directly, anyway."

There was no need for knowing looks at this statement —it had become so repetitive in her presence that all who knew her had ceased any outward emotion at her knowing things before everyone else.

Though it took little time to reach their destination, Ishizu's mind had already begun flitting ahead. They arrived, entered and stood while staring at the road, awaiting a limousine. Already there.

Awkward silence, in a place for remembered past. Ishizu could hear every step of feet on the flooring, as her companions shifted, as the new arrival came towards the building. Kaiba ascended the steps with briefcase in hand (his ready-to-do-business look, she always thought). His face was chiselled in seriousness, and immediately he launched into conversation, not interested in the minor details of why she really wanted him there or what her purpose was, essentially. "You mentioned rare cards. I'm going to assume you wouldn't have made the offer unless you were aware of the strength I already possess."

Never mind a greeting, it seemed. Kaiba stared her down like he owned the place; like she had been the one who had just walked in to do business with him. For a moment, she admired how confident he was that he could take control of the situation. But she wasn't in the mood for allowing him what she'd offered so quickly. It was important to introduce the thought of his past to him —to make him consider the idea of the great significance and history behind everything that he was, his recent actions, and the people that he had encountered and their actions. His ignorance could not be allowed to continue.

So she led him down the halls, taking it one step at a time, like a child. Little things, first. The exhibit was a good start, seeing as how that was her official purpose for being in Japan. A good conversation starter. She engaged his curiosity with mentions of Duel Monsters, explaining what she showed him with the most basic details that she could. In her mind, she was toning her explanations down excessively, but fortunately this seemed to work for his attention span.

The great and fantastical stone she showed him, impressing upon him things that gave his doubt a jolt: the card monsters, the likeness of Yuugi.

Three god monsters, she said, and knew she had won.

Ishizu's mind flitted ahead. She moved to speak again. Golden thoughts about ways to approach everything that would happen next (everything that had already happened), flowing through her mind...memories, but not quite...

"If you're going to keep being so distant, I have half a mind to believe that you aren't serious about any of this," Kaiba said sharply.

Not...

"You keep staring over my head, or at my forehead rather than meeting my eyes. It's like you don't care about this conversation, Ishtar. I don't appreciate having my time wasted. You better get your act together before I leave."

...part of her memories...

"Are you going to keep living in the future, in whatever thoughts of your next meal or your schedule tomorrow that your mind is at? Stop that immediately, it's extremely irritating."

Ishizu opened her eyes, truly opened them, with a shock. Gold dimmed on her neck. Then she knew all feeling, and was again herself.

"You weren't supposed to say that," she said without thinking, eyes wide. She felt around in her mind, anywhere, anywhere, for a thought, but they had all already been taken. They had all been spent, used in the future that already existed. But she _hadn't seen him saying those things_. That lone tumbleweed, bumbling in her head, became a nest of hornets. "I don't remember you saying that."

Kaiba's mouth thinned. "Clearly, you are somewhere, sometime else right now. And since you don't seem to be getting to your point about the past and the nonsense of Duel Monsters and Yuugi and I, I'm going to assume our conversation is finished."

Ishizu found herself scrambling, for once in her life. There, there was a portion of what should have happened. Kaiba demanding she get to the point of her explanation. "I was about to explain that those god monsters were indeed made into cards."

"Not true," Kaiba insisted, and Ishizu found the track of their scripted conversation reappearing, thankfully. She composed her features. "If it was, Pegasus would have used those cards right from the beginning."

There, the lines she knew so well. Kaiba was busy checking his watch. "The cards were too powerful for him to control. So he gave them to me..." And her words droned on, glued and attached to the end of the last pause in her sentence, carefully constructed.

Her composure was ripped away at his next sentence. "This does not sound like you are leading into telling me you will grant me a rare card," Kaiba said decisively, mind still mostly on that offer, as it had been through much of the conversation. Even her speech about pharaohs and priests and duels had been dropped into the sludge of meaningless information at the back of his mind. "This sounds like you're leading into telling me you got into trouble with these powerful cards, and are willing to grant me one if I'll help you get them back." He did not sound anything but monotonous, but his agitated features gave away his annoyance at not obtaining what he wanted right away.

"That's...not quite true." Not supposed to happen. Ishizu's mind poked, poked holes in her stable future. He was getting off-track the script again.

His face smoothed out, thoughtfully, as he said, "This does not seem like we can conclude our conversation easily. If you want something from me, and will offer me something of equal value in return, then we should perhaps discuss exactly what the deal will be at greater length."

"Our conversation ends nearly at this point," Ishizu said in frustration.

Kaiba gave her an exasperated look. "I won't go by your schedule. You'll go by mine, Ishtar."

"You are about to walk away," Ishizu demanded, clawing in her head for the gold that was so sincere and understandable and unchangeable. Kaiba was still exasperated. "I was going to prove myself through visions, shown to you, in order to fully make you believe me."

"That's unnecessary," he said, dryly, probably thinking that she was about to launch into another topic of magic of some sort. Ishizu stood in dumb silence. "I could care less about whether you're lying or not. I just want what you told me you would give me, you see. We'll draw up a contract." Kaiba turned, following the stray, barely visible thread of the future she had known.

Her feet followed numbly. "Contract?"

Kaiba's phone was in his hand, his fingers dialling quickly. There was a click as the call was picked up. "Bring the car around." Another click, disconnected. Back in his pocket.

They passed down halls, back towards the entrance, and startled two men standing in the lobby. It was not the determined Kaiba that bothered them, but the confused and uncertain Ishizu who followed along after him. "I will be back soon," she tried to say with assurance, but in her head her thoughts yelped: I don't know, I don't know.

Ishizu tried to settle into the feeling of mindlessness, but could not get her thoughts out of the present, could not ignore the heavy presence of not knowing and feeling and watching her now uncontrollable future spread out before her. The Necklace was ever silent. Ishizu found herself stiff, as the driver opened the door for them, and she slid in after Kaiba, like a robot. "I won't accept something that is as valuable as a god card without your signature," Kaiba told her, and it took her a moment to realize he was responding to her question earlier.

Her mouth opened slightly, and she wanted to say the words that had already been constructed for her, the words of "You will return the card to me later." But she could not, somehow, deny the steady expression of complete control that Kaiba had. Contract, he'd said. Signature. He was treating this like a business deal.

"Just so that I am aware of what I'm getting into before we start making legal documents," Kaiba said slowly, unaware of Ishizu feeling her further loss of control over the situation. Even though the change was so little. Even though it seemed like everything was going in the direction it was meant to, there was still some change, however unimportant it was. And it bothered her severely. She listened to him, eyes meeting his, completely focussed on their interaction. "Tell me, in short, what you have in mind. And I will decide if that is acceptable."

It occurred to her with surprise (much like most of the interaction with him had went, with surprise) that she had few memories of the last time she had spoken to someone who held her complete attention. She was so used to fading out into the future, looking and looking into things that she would experience, that she often failed to care for the present interaction. It was so often that she let her mind drift, let her thoughts fade into emptiness, and settled into that knowing feeling of having done everything that was to come. But in that moment, Ishizu sat in the comfortable seat of the limousine, and thought: this is comfortable. And thought: where are we going? And thought: there are things that I don't know in this situation.

The feeling of nervousness welled up in her gut. The present. Right. She had to focus. People living in the present had to think on their feet. They didn't have interactions all laid out for them. "I would have you host a tournament for me. Two of the god cards have been stolen by a group of duelists who deal primarily in the black market. With your name on this tournament, they will be lured by the prospect of more rare cards—"

"And will perhaps bring the stolen cards with them," Kaiba said with a grin. The idea already seemed to entertain him.

Ishizu fought a breath at the rush in her head. She'd just had her sentence finished by someone else, of all things. How strange, to be having a conversation and not to know what was going to happen next. The hive of thoughts in her head grew, formulating opinions, structuring sentences, going into tangents. She found herself not sure of how to continue the conversation. The words were all in her head, they just weren't...picked out for her. She swallowed uncertainly.

"I will give you the card I managed to save, to help you through this tournament," she said, hand pulling out the precious, powerful card from amidst folds in her clothing.

His fingers curled around it instantly. Kaiba stared down in awe. "Obelisk..." he breathed.

"Yes," Ishizu said awkwardly. _The Tormentor_, her mind tacked onto the end, to satisfy her waning need to get back to the future she had known so surely.

"With these cards, I can regain my title as the greatest," Kaiba went on to say, though not to her.

The limousine rolled to a halt. Ishizu waited. Her mind did not flit ahead.

Kaiba Corporation's office tower rested outside her window, and as the door opened, she found it discomfiting to have to get out of the vehicle without a certainty of knowing where she was going. As Kaiba exited, he moved forward and she fell into step with him.

The lobby held something that made her pause, and as she stared up at it Kaiba drew to a halt as well, but not with annoyance. He had noticed her gaze resting on the majestic sculpture of his favourite monster, dominating a corner but sufficiently out of the way so as not to disrupt flow of traffic. Blue-Eyes was raised with chest puffing in long inhalation, in preparation for a White Lightning Strike, back legs forming the base of the sculpture and the top ending with her snarling mouth.

"It's good you seem to appreciate art dedicated to powerful cards," Kaiba said with a nod, and turned without another word to continue down a hall.

Ishizu only thought of a priest in a carving, and the monster who defended him. Then she thought of the Rod, which the priest had been carrying. The Rod which clouded her Necklace's gaze. An Item that had been used for controlling the futures of others, clouding her judgement of the future of its wielder. She vaguely wondered if Kaiba too had an affinity for the Rod. If, even with distance, it protected him. Or maybe some aspect of Kaiba's being, some part that had in an ancient past controlled others, was above the clutch of her envisioned fate and destiny.

Either way, she followed him into an office.

Time moved so much more slowly, in the present. This was Ishizu's prevalent thought, as she paid attention and made eye contact and let him make plans for the tournament, all while glancing at Obelisk now resting on the desk.

When all was said and done, pages signed and tucked away into folders, Ishizu made to leave.

"The car just outside will take you back to the museum," Kaiba said.

"Yes..." Ishizu felt her heart beating harder than she thought was normal. Was this what it felt like, making interactions while worrying about consequences? Making decisions within moments and outside of thought of the future threads of fate?

Kaiba frowned at her still standing there. "Do you need to be shown back to the entrance?"

"No," Ishizu said, "I just wished to say that it has been a pleasure speaking with you." Pleasure? The man was practically dangerous, as often as she didn't know things around him. But yes, somehow, the word seemed to fit. She found herself pleased with their conversation.

"Fine."

There was some silence. Kaiba looked up from his examination of Obelisk. "It would be nice," Ishizu said with her uncertainty plucking at her insides again, "to speak again after all of this is over."

"...I suppose."

After a second of hesitation, Ishizu turned and left, and found herself walking until she was standing outside on the curb, as the driver opened the door for her. She thought she'd seen —no, there was no mistake— a flash of white-blue on a card, peaking out of Kaiba's suit pocket. Could it have been all along the inclusion of his favoured dragon, his deck, in his pocket that day that had let him defy her vision? Was it an attempt at reassuring her, an Item bearer, that her brother could be saved, that that card spirit had cried out to its master and dissolved his connection to the path of fate they'd been walking on? Could that have been what had happened?

It was possible she'd never know. Yet, that thought did not bother her as much as it should have. Not knowing...she wondered if she could associate that with 'excitement' now. Maybe that was what she was feeling, that was making her gut twist.

Ishizu sat in the vehicle, and listened to the door close. She felt the familiar mindlessness at the edge of her thought processes, like a reminder.

Instead of accepting, she found herself wondering if it was possible that maybe, just maybe, she was never going to get Obelisk back.

(end)


End file.
